So, my step-mother (technically… it’s a long story) posted this to her Facebook Status…

Every woman deserves a man who calls her baby, kisses her like he means it. Holds her tight like he never wants to let go, doesn’t make her jealous of other women, instead makes other women jealous of her, is not scared to let his friends and family know how he really feels about her and won’t let any of them treat her bad, lets her know how much he really loves her…

…and it really got me thinking. It really struck a chord. Normally, I ignore über right-wing FB Status Updates, requests to join their Mafia, or play Be-Jeweled… especially when they end with “if you agree, then please re-post.” I’m just not that much of a follower… I guess. Well, she got me this time.

What struck me the most was “…doesn’t make her jealous of other women, instead makes other women jealous of her…” Wow. That’s exactly where I’ve failed… especially with my ex-girlfriend. And it’s not a difficult thing to do. I mean, how hard is it to be attentive to your soul-mate’s needs? So, why in God’s name did I make such a painfully obvious mistake? I’m still trying to figure it out.

Conversely, Ken at “Everything Must Go” offered his male perspective thus:

Every man deserves a woman who respects him to his face and behind his back, doesn’t cheat, doesn’t sexually reject him but is an enthusiastic lover, keeps herself together, doesn’t make him jealous of other men, instead makes other men jealous of him, sends him off to have time with the guys with a smile instead of eye-daggers, lets him do things for her, doesn’t treat him like one of her girlfriends, tells him what she needs instead of expecting him to read her mind or decipher hints, is not scared to let her friends know how she really feels about him, and lets him know how much she appreciates and respects him…

From my perspective, these feel as close to a perfect analysis as I’ve read in quite a while.

Women are not accustomed to men who are straight-forward or blunt… whereas, men do not like having to second-guess their mate’s intentions. Wow! It’s a miracle that ANY of us can get along. Both sexes are behind the eight-ball every step of the moment.

My advice to everyone who reads this: Stop the nonsense! Get with the program! You are in love! Shout it out from the mountain tops! You are going to have differences. It’s SO very common. Trust them as much as they trust you. Tell them what you are feeling. Don’t be ashamed. You have their back, right? Take the criticism. They wouldn’t be offering if they didn’t give a damn. Do what needs to be done. Get help… some really good help. The two of you can’t do this alone, can you? Take those dancing lessons, get into couples-therapy, sing, dance, eat, be vulnerable, help them, do what it takes. You love them, right? Of course you do. That’s why the two of you will survive… because, the two of you are in love with each other… and that is a beautiful thing. Make those other couples jealous. Do it. I dare you.

I’ve “shanked” the best relationship I have ever had because of my stubbornness. Please… don’t let this happen to you.

Henry the 5th

I am currently learning my lines as the “Duke of Exeter” for Iowa City’s Dreamwell Theater production of Shakespeare’s “The Life of King Henry the Fifth.”

I have my “Kittredge: Players Illustrated Edition” by my side, but still… no matter how I attempt to deliver them… my lines come-off as a combination of Brian Blessed (from Kenneth Branagh’s film version) and Sam Elliot. My voice is TOO DEEP! Gaaagh!

Like many from the 80′s refrain: I wanna’ be a cowboy!

Continue Reading »

iPhone4

Yeah, I drank the Kool-Aid.

So, I buy the phone…

In my defense, for all you Android fans, I’ve been among the Motorola camp for many years:  switching my Nokia “brick” for the Moto RAZR and then the RAZR2 & its fabulous camera (a cellphone which VZW dropped mere months after I switched… still not sure what THAT was about.)

Alas, I’ve been limping along on the RAZR2′s ORIGINAL battery for 3 years before Apples’s iPhone4 was finally relinquished to Verizon’s expansive network of CDMA towers. Yes, it won’t do data AND voice at the same time… but, neither did the original iPhone… until the iPhone 3G was released. So… Bite Me!

I’ve been impressed so far. Of course, there’s been a bit of a learning curve, but much of that has been setting the phone up to work for me: setting Alarms, Ringtones (which there aren’t many built-in), and organizing my Contacts list. The actual “swap” at the Verizon Store from my Moto RAZR2 to the iPhone 4 was fairly straight-forward. It took some time to finally Activate it, but I suspect it had much to do with the number of Verizon customers doing the very same thing as I that Saturday afternoon.

I had waited a couple weeks before making the switch; I really don’t consider myself an “early adopter”. I watched the multiple Gawker sites and kept a close eye on Engadget to read the general reaction. I read about the similar “Grip of Death” that plagued the AT&T version, but knew that if I picked up a decent case… I wouldn’t be having those issues. Spent some cash on a package of Pure-Gear “Display Protectors” and was impressed with the amount of thought that went into assisting the user on how to best apply the “cover friendly” scratch-guard. The fact that they included a screen wipe (the same I find when purchasing high-end SLR camera lens’s) was most impressive.  Now, I know why they cost $15 for 3 protectors.

As soon as I got it home, I immediately sync’d it to my Windows XP desktop. Even though iTunes can be a little buggy & bloated, it sync’d with no problems and quickly began scarfing my tunes. With that finished, I quickly began downloading applications from the iTunes Store: Find my Phone, PS Express, Labelbox, IMDb, Facebook, Twitter, Remote, Skype, NPR News, CNN, RedLaser, Mint, eBay, Craigslist, SoundHound and as many Free Angry Birds games as possible.

The REAL standouts are:

• Find my Phone – Reports back your phone’s GPS coordinates & will locate your lost/stolen phone
• Remote – Remotely control iTunes from your WiFi Access Point
• RedLaser – Scans barcodes using the camera, identifies the item, how much it costs and where it can be found.
• SoundHound – Hum a few bars or record audio from the radio and it will tell you the name of that song that’s been nagging you all day.

These are really “niche” applications, but they really show the capabilities of the iPhone 4 and how easy it can be to integrate all the gizmo’s inside.

6 Months Later…

Now, I’ve had this phone for 6 months and it’s still running like a champ. I did manage to crack the backside glass shell, though. I’m not sure why Apple decided to surround the iPhone4 in Gorilla Glass, but it was a pretty bad move. My old Nokia or Motorola RAZR would have shrugged-off that waist-high plummet to the concrete with aplomb. The iPhone? Not so much. I’m keeping most of the shards intact by pasting a section of Clear Packing Tape to the back shell.

Obviously, my next case will something a bit more durable than a silicone rubber sock. Although, I enjoyed the anti-slip feature when I placed the iPhone on the dash of my Mercedes. Fortunately for me, replacing the back glass is rather cheap: $20 – $40 bucks on eBay, including tools.

I can count on one hand, the number of times a single charge did NOT last me the entire day. In addition, I’m suprised I didn’t break the glass sooner, as I typically carry the iPhone4 in my back pocket. After all those hours sitting at my desk or driving between Iowa City and Cedar Rapids… I’m amazed I hadn’t bent the thing in half.

I’m also impressed with the fact that I’ve yet to replace the initial screen-protector. Yeah, it’s developed a few tiny bubbles… but, they’ve never impeded the scrolling features. Win!

My ONLY complaint: The front-facing camera sucks. Oh, GAWD, does it suck. I’ve retired my personal digital camera for the iPhone4′s back camera, with built-in HDR recording capabilities. But, that front-facing camera? GAG!

Conclusion

All-in-all… this is one solid phone with more features than I suspect I’ll ever really use. The cell-phone has finally matured.

The digital Renaissance Man of Eastern Iowa [Chris Hanel] has finally decided to leave the midwest for the potential glory  on the East Coast (Orange County, no doubt). Chris’s departure weighs heavy upon the many friends he’s made here in Iowa City. Noboy wants to see Chris and Kori leave, but we fully support their decision. A man’s gotta do, what you gotta do. Here’s a man with talent: Exceptional Artist, Video Effects Editor, Coordinatior, Writer, Director, Actor, Improv Comedy Aficionado.

In the three years since he’s been back in Iowa, we’ve been able to put-forth an audience/fan script-submitted MST3K-Style Movie Heckling experience with Riff Raff Theater. When Chris had the time, he’d jump in to a Comics In Action gig… like the one at Coe Collage…

Of coure, this was not the ONLY time he’d worked with Comics In Action.

Then again, there is the multitude of movie we skewered under the guise of Riff Raff Theater. Here’s a clip.

You will be sorely missed, Mr. Hanel. Stay in touch. We’ll always have your back.

O Noze! Me Earz Iz 2 BEEG!

I don’t know where Venkmann (aka Twerp) went. Everyone is sad. I’ve looked all over the apartment (even under the futon) and I can’t find him. My Over-Lords had him in the living room the other night, but neither of them would let me play with him. Maybe Venkmann was tired of my rough-housing. Maybe he asked them if he could leave. I wouldn’ve played nice… maybe.

I don’t know. They put him in that horrid carrier and left. It was a couple hours before they returned and the plastic jail was empty. The Over-Lords were crying when they got back, so maybe he escaped and ran away. I hope not. I think he’s too young to be on his own. He’s so little. There’s hardly any flesh on his bones.. I know, I’ve bit him (but, it was just “play” biting… honest).

He needs to come back home. I’ll be good this time. If you see him (see picture below), let him know I’ll let him sleep in my bed every once in a while and I won’t beat him up so much anymore. Don’t tell him that I miss him, though. OK. You can tell him that I miss him. Just bring him back. OK?

Have You Seen This Cat? Contact Spengler.

Editor’s Note: Dr. Venkmann, the kitten we rescued nearly a week and half ago, passed away around 9am Tuesday morning from respiratory failure. Returning from work, Angie found him in our bedroom; quite listless with labored breathing. The vet at the 24-hour clinic thought he may have had some respiratory infection, but with a normal feline temperature, it was difficult to diagnose.  X-rays were inconclusive, but reinforced the opinion that his lungs were quite damaged. Perhaps it was a condition he was simply born with, but he had a 1 in 3 chance of making it. We did our best, but we had little time to get him well. We are very sad to see him go. He was a good little guy. At his peak, he was simply a “purr-factory” and quite playful. He shall be sorely missed. God takes kittens to Heaven… or at least, He should.

Poster: Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead

“It costs little to watch, and little more if you happen to get caught up in the action, if that’s your taste and times being what they are.”

To decipher meaning out of a seemingly insignificant phrase, or so it might seem otherwise….if there is any meaning behind it at all. To Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, the world is naught but a tangle of episodes into which they have been summoned to unravel the delusions of their old-school friend, Hamlet.

September 3-5 & 10-12 at 7:30pm at the Riverside Festival Stage, City Park, Iowa City. Tickets are available at the door, or by calling the ICCT box office at 319-338-0443.

Directed by James Trainor, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead features the talents of Brad Quinn and David Priebe.

Of course, I’ll be in the show as well as one of the Tragedians. This is gonna’ be a LOT of fun.

Spengler: Sleepy Time

Oh, great! Just what I need!

The twerp’s not even potty-trained and the caretakers are talking about letting him stay. Can you believe it? He’s got ear-mites (which are almost dripping off of him) and they gave him a “feline leukemia” test which came back NEGATIVE… which probably means he’s mentally challenged or something (i.e. stupid!) I mean, he just sits there and purrs! Just Purrs! That’s all… and poops… and eats… and purrs… and poops some more. C’mon man!

Me? I gots skills. I roll around on the floor when the caretakers get home and beg for attention in the finest feline way! Stretch, pet, roll, pet tummy, roll, pet other side, roll, and bite finger! That’s the way it’s done, dude! Ask me. I’ll tell how it’s done.

For now, I’m just gonna stare and growl in a completely unambiguous way. The caretakers won’t know, but the black fur-ball will know. He’ll know I’m boss, cuz’ I could TOTALLY take him. That’s right. That’s what I’m talkin’ about.

Oooh. I just heard thunder… must be another storm… I could totally grab one of those light-branches that shoot downward from the sky. Bring one of those home and I’ll TOTALLY own this house. Meh… I’m gonna gather my strength and just… Zzzzzzzzzzzzz.

[Show as slideshow]